The Lost Child II

Greetings followers:

Happy Holidays!  Beginning today the My ACOA Life Blog will be posted every Thursday.

I was reading an article online by Louise Behiel entitled “The Lost Child: Invisible and Unheard.”  She said that the lost child, which I identify as, understands or feels the strain the family is under.  As a result, they try to minimize their demands on their parents and siblings.  I certainly avoided any push back my parents might have given by not asking to go to parties and other events that I knew they would not approve of.  I didn’t fight for the things I really wanted.  To this day, I feel somewhat guilty when I attend a number of events in close proximity of each other.  Behiel says, as a result, lost children are often overlooked.  This leaves them feeling lonely, rejected and isolated.  The conundrum is they get what they want but that result leaves them feeling empty.  The lost child spends much time doing activities such as daydreaming, fantasizing, reading, and watching television.  This describes my childhood to a tee. 

This article also got me thinking about another article I read, in which I learned that I was a compulsive eater.  It got me wondering…does compulsive eating mean I’m feeling empty inside; that the inner child in me is starved for affection or attention.  Am I denying that this exist in me because I was taught to be strong and independent?  This is more eye-opening information to ponder.

Hi, I’m Liz Hawkins and I’m an Adult Child of an Alcoholic.