Fight or Flight

As an adult child of an alcoholic I have learned that we tend to have compulsive personalities, which predisposes us to developing addictions.  Because I despised my father’s drinking so much, I vowed not to become a drunk like him.  However, I did become an emotional eater.  When ACOAs overeat or binge eat, we are eating to meet a need.

Karly Randolph Pitman, author of Overcoming Sugar Addition, says that no matter how we are using food, we heal by turning toward our pain; relating to it with kindness and compassion.  One of the needs that drives overeating is the fight or flight response, also known as the acute stress response.  This is eating to soothe the build-up of anxiety, fear, inner tension, or stress.  Pitman explains that in this instance, overeating is almost like a panic attack.  When you finally eat that donut or chocolate cake, the anxiety has reached its breaking point, and you turn to food to cope.  When you binge or overeat, you initially feel better because you have lowered the anxiety and stress.  You’re not in fight or flight anymore, but you feel terrible for bingeing. 

This has been the story of my life and I never recognized it as a problem until now.  When I was a child I ate all the sweets I desired; just being a kid I surmised.  But when I started having weight issues as an adult, it is not so easy to give up the food that gives so much comfort.  I often find myself in a vicious cycle of dieting and losing weight, only to binge eat and regain the weight back (and more).  Food became my drug of choice, as alcohol was my father’s drug of choice.

Today, I’m trying to find ways to lower my anxiety and inner tension.  ACOAs tend to put a lot of pressure on themselves.  For me, I know this is true.  I am learning to relax my standards a bit and give myself a break.  I’m still a work in progress – taking it one day at a time.

Hi, I’m Liz Hawkins and I’m a recovering Adult Child of an Alcoholic.