Shedding 2016

I had a dream last night.  I don’t remember what it was about exactly but a snake figured prominently.  Oddly, when I awoke, I wasn’t afraid but I was curious about the significance of the snake.

Snakes shed their skin to allow for further growth and to remove parasites that have attached to their old skin.  As a snake grows, its skin becomes stretched.  The classic dream of the snake is a symbol of transformation. 

This year, through my continued learning about being an adult child of an alcoholic, I can see that I have grown.  I have shed a lot of my old insecurities, self-doubt, people pleasing, and other classic adult child characteristics.  I have also removed people from my life who sought to bring me down rather than lift me up.  The transformation is uncomfortable but worth it because I’m finally becoming the person my Creator made me to be.

Hi, I’m Liz Hawkins and I’m a recovering Adult Child of an Alcoholic.

The Gift of Change

As we enter the season of giving I can’t help but to reflect on my life.  A year ago I was discovering what it means to my life to be an Adult Child of an Alcoholic (ACOA).  Through study and gaining knowledge I’ve been able to make many small but significant changes in my life and in myself.

With these changes also came a spiritual transformation.  With the outcome of the 2016 United States Presidential election, the world seems to have been tossed off its axis.  What does this mean for humanity?  Sorry, it’s my ACOA trait – anxiety kicking in. 

When I say I want world peace, first I have to understand that without inner peace, there will be no world peace.  One of the ways in which I can serve the cause of humanity is to be within myself; a genuinely spiritual person respecting all sects and creeds, but standing on my own as a conduit of higher truth.  I will not wait for peace to be handed to me as a gift for good behavior but will do the inner work needed to achieve it.

I look forward to continued growth and transformation in the coming New Year.  Hi, I’m Liz Hawkins and I’m an Adult Child of an Alcoholic.

#ACoAAwareness

www.innerlook.com

Distorted Reasoning

Some ACOAs suffer with distorted reasoning, a disease that distorts the reasoning all around them.  Because we try so hard to hide the pain of watching ourselves and those we love become mired in the disease and losing our grip on our own happiness, we use our thinking to twist and bend the truth into a more palatable shape.

We rationalize and deny what is right in front of us, make excuses and sometimes lie because it makes us feel better than to admit the truth.  The alcoholic lies to hide their uses and abuses, the family members lie to hide the extent of addiction and their fear, pain, and confusion. 

Soon our thinking becomes so filled with denial and rationalization that we lose our own sense of what is normal.  Eventually, our sense of reality becomes distorted.  This was the story of my life.  But now I am able to tolerate the truth because I know that I have a program, I have accepted the things I cannot change and changed the things I can.

Hi, I’m Liz Hawkins and I’m a recovering Adult Child of an Alcoholic.

#ACOAAwareness

@TrinityUniv

www.Innerlook.com

The Confusion Inside

In the bible, James 3:13-14, it says “the reason there is so much confusion around you is because there is so much confusion in you.”  The root word for confusion is confuse, which means to be unclear, indistinct, and to have no clarity.

Because Adult Children of Alcoholics live with constant dysfunction, we don’t know what’s normal.  We have to guess or try to figure it out on our own.  We see our friends’ parents and the television moms like Mrs. Brady, God rest her soul, and wonder why our family life looks so different.

We feel different from everyone else; like the odd ball.  Some of us try desperately to fit in at any cost.  It’s no wonder there is so much confusion inside.

Hi, I’m Liz Hawkins and I’m a recovering Adult Child of an Alcoholic.

ACOAs and Interpersonal Relationships

Growing up with an alcoholic father caused me to have some problems with interpersonal relationships.  I find that I need help to learn the things that I was deprived of growing up.  As a child, the world within an alcoholic household was both unpredictable and unstable.

Daughters need to feel that they can count on their father to care for them and to love them.  I certainly could not depend on my father.  Promises made while he was drunk were soon forgotten when he was sober.

The stages for development that all children need are proper nurturing, support and guidance.  My father was seriously lacking in these areas and as a result I did not develop a sense of self, and sense of self-esteem, like other children did.

I’m grateful for knowledge and the great strides that I’ve made in the past year.  Hi, I’m Liz Hawkins and I’m a recovering Adult Child of an Alcoholic.

#ACoA_Awareness
#myacoalife
#breakinggenerationalcurses