Have Fun

Growing up with an alcoholic father and an ACOA mother placed a high burden of responsibility on me and I was constantly seeking approval.  This has stayed with me throughout my adulthood.  I tend to be oversensitive to the needs of others; my self-esteem seems to come from other people’s judgments, and I seem to have a need for perfectionism and acceptance.

I also find it hard to completely relax.  Even when everything is going great, I’m usually worrying about something.  However, I cherish those rare moments when I can completely be in the moment, relax and be myself.  One such moments came recently when I attended my grand-nephew’s first birthday party. 

Ever since I began to understand what it means to be ACOA, I am learning to have fun like my life depends on it.  For ACOAs this is really hard to do.  The truth is, living with an alcoholic is the most boring thing you will ever do.  All that burden of responsibility, being on edge 24/7, having to be the sensible one, the entire time.  It’s exhausting.
I pledge to myself to make more time for fun activities and unburden myself from the past.  Letting my hair down won’t turn me into my alcoholic parent; it will release me from the responsibility trap it put on me.

Hi, I’m Liz Hawkins and I am a recovering Adult Child of an Alcoholic.

#myacoalife